Archive for September, 2006

Damn it feels good to be gangsta. I am watching K…

September 28, 2006

Damn it feels good to be gangsta.

I am watching King of the Hill at Troy’s house (aka my old house). He’s at class and the internet at my house isn’t working, so I’m using his laptop to do homework… and other things. I always seem to end up on myspace and wikipedia when I’m doing homework. Strange how that goes, eh? This is the episode where Peggy enters the Mrs. Arlen beauty pageant. It’s a good one, wahaha.

An interview by Anthony Ambers. If anyone has additional questions or wish to interview me, feel free to shoot me an email.

1.)> So what would an average day with Lauren look like:

I don’t have an average day… it’s always different. Sometimes I’ll sleep almost all day, wake up at night, go to work, come home or go to a friends house and get high and watch TV until 6am. I try to keep busy, because if I have too much spare time I sleep or shop. Today I woke up at 10, took a shower, did my hair, went to school at 11:30, then went to the animal shelter and looked at dogs, then went back to school, then rolled by my place and ate a sandwhich and now I’m at Troy’s. I’ll be off to school again in about an hour and then after class I’m going to get drunk at Big Dick’s (no stalkers, please).

2.) I know that you like the Clean Cut look in your men, But what are the Physical attributes you look for in the male population? ( what are your favorite body parts both above and below the neck.

Clean cut? I suppose… but I don’t mind a rockstar, punky looking kind of guy. I find that look hot… I do usually date preppy guys though. Basically, I need a cute face, decent style, and a nice body. I like tall, thin guys. Good hair will go a long way with me. My first boyfriend had great hair. A nice smile, nice eyes, nice skin, and nice teeth are good, but I like unique looks too. As long as I’m attracted to a person it’s all good. Personality goes way further than looks.

3.) Let’s say that you were on a cruise ship and the ship wrecked and you washed up on a Deserted Island, the Cruise Ship was a special Cruise liner that most of our Famous Stars usually went on for vacation, two other survivors wash ashore a Man and a Woman, both Famous Stars who would you want them to be and what would be their responsibilities on the Island?

Lol, this one’s a doozy! The woman would be Rachel Ray. She would cook for us. The man would be Jesse Woodrow. He would be my lover.

4.) You have got to have the best pair of legs I’ve ever seen, so take me on a tour starting from your hair working all the way down to your toes, telling me about each body part, what you like and what you don’t like?

Um… no.

5.) People say that they would rather be poor and in love v.s. rich and unhappy. That is a load of Shit, we all know that if you’re poor there will always be money issues that effect the Bedroom which will effect out of the Bedroom and how can that be Happiness?
Society has told us that we need to be Married with a family, great job, etc….to be considered part of Society.
So tell me would you rather be a multi millionaire with the ability to have any man you chose whenever you please but stay single for the rest of your life? or Just have enough Money to make it by, Happily married with children?

The second one. Definitely. I want true love.

6.) Romance v.s. Thrill seeking, what would be the more ideal date for Lauren? Would you rather a guy show up with a rose, take you out to dine at a fancy restaurant, go see a movie then dancing, afterwards a stroll along the beach walking barefoot in the sand, then back to the finest hotel with a candle lit bath and rose petal covered bed room lit in candles? or A hike up a cliff side next to a waterfall then skinny dipping in the water after you get to the top, then doing some sky diving, horse back riding or hang gliding then going to a noisy bar and get trashed? which would be the more Ideal date? or you can mix and match these.

Either date sounds great if it’s with someone I love. It’s all about chemistry.

7.) How old were you when you first discovered Madame wonderful?

Wtf is Madame Wonderful? And if it’s something dirty, then fuck off.

8.) If you became a Famous Actress and you got the role of a life time starring in a major motion picture and the script called for you to do a love scene ( Kissing, making out, nipple caressing and kissing,) with another Actress and you got to chose who it would be, who would you chose?

You need to get laid, buddy.

I didn’t realize how dirty these were until I started reading through them. Interview finished – no more questions, please! lol

Poutine: Poutine (pronounced, roughly, poo-teen, o…

September 23, 2006

Poutine: Poutine (pronounced, roughly, poo-teen, or poot-sin) is a dish consisting of french fries topped with fresh cheese curds and covered with hot gravy (usually brown gravy) and sometimes other additional ingredients. The curds’ freshness is important as it makes them soft in the warm fries, without completely melting.

I think I’m going to start a poutine delivery service. Man… I know my poutine. I just need to get a good fry/sauce/curds combination and SELL THAT SHIT!!! yeah yeah.

By the way… HAHAHAHAHAHA.

I want to make a poutine calendar… And I thin…

September 22, 2006

I want to make a poutine calendar…

And I think I’m going to throw a poutine party as well.

That shit is like crack, yo!

I can’t believe I actually drove last night in the…

September 22, 2006

I can’t believe I actually drove last night in the state I was in. Holy shit. I’m all for drinking and driving, but DRUNKEN driving is just stupid. Not only drunk, but completely stoned off my ass too. I don’t even know where I parked my car… I think it might be around the corner. I hope.

I think today I’m going to go grocery shopping, do my mountains of laundry, clean my room, and then hang out at one of my friends’ houses until I have to go to work.

Last night my roomates had these guys over and everyone was drunk and one of them kept trying to get into my room. I was actually pretty scared. Thank god for deadbolts.

It’s exhausting putting on a front like everything is okay when you’re in so much pain. My stomach feels like it’s in a big knot. I need to keep distracted though, it’s the only way I can get past this and move on. I just can’t believe it’s over… I am never falling in love again. Not for a long, long time. It’s just too painful.

oh pretty pretty houndstooth coat – you will be mi…

September 21, 2006

oh pretty pretty houndstooth coat – you will be mine!!! as soon as my parents get back from New York, you will be mine. I love you.

I’m wasted and stoned like woah. Good times… good night.

Friday night at Dean’s…

September 19, 2006

I STOLE THESE FROM CUMFARTS DUFF LEMEZZ!!!!! Thanks girl 🙂

Friday night Jacqueline, Amanda and I attended a roca wear fashion show at Dean Martinis (swanky nights!). It was an awesome time. The clothes were cool, the models were hot, and the drinks were fantastic. A lot of fun things happened that night – ran into a lot of people I know, had way too many free drinks and shots of hypnotic, and when I’m not paying for booze, I don’t think twice about drinking it. I got wasted. Jackie and Amanda did too, but I don’t think to the same extent… oh – and apparently Brooke Hogan was there? I didn’t see her though…

Cast of Characters…

Jacqueline the emo:

Amanda the glass breaker! I love this picture:

Lauren the lush retard:

Before the madness…

VIP because we’re starrrrrs 😉

The beautiful people:

Tailor James, in the flesh:

Only when I’m drinking does the gay ass braces smile come out. Go ahead haters… I’m ready for you.

Those green things are Dean’s Martinis – they’re delicious. notice my newly coloured hair?

The slopshow begins…

Clean Clean laughing at my drunken antics:

On stage, breaking it down:

I had quite an audience going apparently:

Always a performer when I’m drunk:

Another contender!!! off come the shoes – DANCE BATTLE!:

Oh hellllz no. Doing some type of drunken skipping thing… I loved that girl – she was so cute.

Should I be posting these pics in my blog? lol.

Wow.

I will probably take some of these down soon… but I am in a good mood and thought I’d share my retarded drunkness with you all.

I have some news… some good news… I will share in a bit though, when I’m a little more comfortable with it.

lover…

September 15, 2006

you let me down.

ambitious!

September 14, 2006

feeling: ambitious and frustrated
listening to: the Tyra show
wearing: My little brother’s CK Hawks gym shirt and some blue underwear (mine – not his).

I’m going to start keeping a real life journal. I’m also going to start spending one hour per week doing something for me – taking a walk at dawn, painting my toe nails, cooking, doing a craft, playing with lego, going to the animal shelter, playing a video game… any other suggestions? I would also like to start writing a comic strip, make a short film, write for my school newspaper, take a bartending course and start writing an outline for a novel. Ambitious, aren’t I? These are some of my goals for the next year. I feel like I’m not really doing anything lately. I work, I go to school, I sleep, I party – but I don’t really create. I have this website, which is great for self expression, but I want more. I really do want to make a comic strip – maybe FOR the school newspaper. That would be sweet. Now I only need to practice my drawing skills and write some good comics.

I just got home from Faces. I made good money tonight. Bitches were haaayyyyting though, hahaha.

I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. I realized something tonight, with the help of a good friend. When it comes to relationships, I’m a pushover. It’s not something that I would actively recognize myself, but when it was brought up it just sort of clicked. It’s so true. I let things slide because 1) I hate conflict 2) I’m so insecure that half the time I think I’m wrong to be upset, even when I have every right to be and 3) I don’t want to be alone. I settle in relationships when things aren’t right – where I’m being taken for granted and know it. I can’t be mad at a guy for not treating me the way I deserve to be treated when I LET him treat me that way. I need someone who is there for me when I need him. Who does things with me. Who really makes me feel like I am an important part of his life. I can almost guarantee that my current boyfriend won’t read this. He would rather spend his time sending flirty messages to other girls than read his boring old girlfriend’s blog. My dearest friends say that I deserve better. I’m an interesting girl, god damnit – I think so anyways… and the fact that he doesn’t give a fuck makes me doubt that about myself. Letting someone take you for granted makes you think less of yourself… makes you think that you’re not worth being adored. I’m funny and caring and cool and talented and smart and it would be nice to hear that from someone other than the people who send me random myspace messages. I think it might be partly my own problem. I AM a pushover. I don’t stand up for myself or for what I want and I just bottle all of the feelings inside and take it out on myself by stressing about my future, the way I look, the way I act. I really need some source of strength. I don’t know what to do…. I’m in love and I’m in pain.

I’m going to go to bed. Class tommorow morning at 11:30am. yayyy.

Ew. there is a huge spider on my ceiling. I’m looking at it crawl as I type. sooo creeepppyyyy. I don’t want to kill it… but I won’t be able to sleep until I do something. I really miss my mom and dad in situations like this.

bizzzaccckkkk

September 10, 2006

god DAMN I say god damn!

It’s been a while, I know. Things have been… hectic to say the least. I could fill three pages with all the things I have to blog about, but I’ll keep it concise.

1. I moved. I am now living in a sweet effing house about a 5 minute drive from my old house. I can’t disclose the location, but it’s a bit further away from school, a bit closer to downtown. It’s really nice though. Clean, pretty, and my roomates are all cool. I’m living with 4 girls this year – as opposed to 4 boys last year. The girls are significantly less dirty, but I still miss being able to watch the simpsons and get high with my old roomies. They were great. My one roomate is a badass chef which is killer – It’s nice to have a break from pizza pockets and mcdonald’s every so often. I really like all of them, which is nice – I was worried that there might be a bitch in the house or something but there isn’t at all – I think I’m going to have a good year here.

A few photos of my bedroom – taken with the cell phone because I was too lazy to break out the digicam.





2. I started classes AND a new job. H&M decided to schedule me for 42.5 hours this week, knowing that I am a full time student. This means that pretty much whenever I’m not at school, I’m working… leaving no time for fun, sorority pledge stuff, and most importantly – homework. KYPHE! So I dunno… I might just have to say byebye to H&M. I start working at faces tonight. Feck – It’s like whenever I want a job I can’t get one, and whenever I have one the offers start rolling in. Life, eh? Oh, I quit Woody’s btw. I miss the staff already 😦

3. I’ve been partying like mad the last week

4. DRAMA. I found out that this bitch who moved into my old house at the beginning of the summer had been stealing from me all summer. I caught her with my webcam. I can’t believe how stupid I was. I was naive… thinking that I was losing all this money. Over 600$ – at least. Bitch is going to pay. I confronted her last night in a big showdown. I was way too nice, because I’m a very non confrontational person, but Jacqueline tore her a new asshole which was really nice 🙂 She said all the things I wanted to say but couldn’t. LAZY BITCH NEEDS TO GET UP OFF HER FAT ASS AND CLEAN HER STANK ASS ROOM! hahaha. Her snotty ass ran out of the house and biked away on flat tires, courtesy of Tristan (wahahaha). It was so funny to watch her almost fall off the bike. I told her that if she doesn’t give me the money in a month I’m going to the police, but I’m going to call them Monday anyways. I got an admission out of her at least – plus a video of her stealing. That’s evidence enough to get her ass in a LOT of trouble. Dumb cunt.

That’s all for now. I need to eat some nachos, take a power nap, and then get ready for work. Tommorow I’m getting my hair coloured and then probably buying some schoolbooks and OH! I might have a photoshoot too. I’m a busy girl, but I’ll never stop blogging about my adventures because even though my skills aren’t exactly amazing, I love to write. I also love to talk about myself. Blogging is great 🙂

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September 7, 2006

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