Archive for August, 2005

lonnnnggg blog.

August 27, 2005

I have so much to say. This is going to be a long blog, so please bear with me mmmkkk?

First off – CONTEST!!!!: Make me some fan-art! It can be a vector, a cartoon, a poem, a song, a photoshopped image of me (or you), a fansign – ANYTHING GOES! Be creative! First place wins a free 30 day membership to (the hottest portal in the universe – esp. now that they have archived streaming shows!), a personalized desktop wallpaper from me, and a fansign! Second place wins a wallpaper and a fansign, and third place wins a fansign. All entries will be posted (unless you don’t want me to). Got it? good. Send your entries to – contest ends September the 10th – so hurrrrry up and enter soon!

Now, for possibly the most important issue in this blog: THANK YOU TOLOUGAN!!! Lougan is the owner of and some other sites, like K-IRB radio – and I think we’ve been friends for… well – about a year now, give or take – am I right Lougan? Anyways – he’s offered to host nakedbarbies for me – and I couldn’t be more grateful. So, I’m all moved in – still working on getting the gallery back up to date and stuff – but my site is quite happy at it’s new home 🙂 is actually a pretty fucking awesome site – and I’m guessing that if you’re here, checking out my blog, you’re pretty bored. So go join the forums, and check out the portal and the gallery and OH! the arcade! they’re got fucking hexxagon! I dare you to NOT get addicted. K-IRB radio is pretty sweet too – especially when I start doing my show again 🙂 harharhar – you love my annoying litte voice.

Right now, I’m simultaneously uploading pictures from my digital camera, transferring pictures from a cd and uploading 2 movies and coppermine to my ftp. I hope that nothing blows up. I know it won’t… I’ve just watched Sin City too many times. Everyone blows up in that movie – or gets eaten by Elijah Wood *shudder*. I have never been so scared of a hobbit in my life.

Nick Stahl’s character was scary too – and REALLY ugly – which is so un-characteristic of him since, ya know, he’s hottttt.

Meow Nick Stahl – Meow indeed. And meow to Bruce Willis too, if he was like 20 years younger.
What a great movie Sin City is! I loved it. Go rent it. Now. It’s great.

A lot of you liked my last blog – the interview with my friend Jacqueline. I should do things like that more often! haha – scroll down to read it if you haven’t yet – she sure is a funny girl! As I promised a couple of weeks ago, here are some of the photos from her birthday party – enjoy!

We were a bit hammered… some of us more than others, hehe *cough* birthday girl *cough*. It was really fun though- everyone was buying Jacqueline free drinks, and that was cool – for her. I can’t wait until my birthday! WAHAHAHA!

In other news – I got yet another new kitten! This one isn’t actually mine, it’s the family’s cat – Dimey’s replacement (R.I.P. sweet baby girl). He’s a seal point ragdoll and he’s 4 months old – but SOOO tiny! He’s the runt of the litter, and so adorable! he purrs constantly and loves to cuddle and be around people. Tickery isn’t too fond of him, but they’re co-habitating well… apart from the occasional hissing match. Here they are together, looking precious:

Poor Tickery just came home from the veterinarian on Thursday – she’s been de-clawed and spayed. She’s been resting a lot. She likes to cuddle too:

Awwww 🙂

I would like to “Shout-Out” to Kate and Brandon who came over to my house the other day! It was so awesome to see you guys and catch up and what not – We must party sometime Miss Kathryn Suzanne! And because a shout-out MUST consist of some sort of crazy shouting (I think) – “HOLLLLAAAAAAHH!!!”

Well… I just cut out about half of this blog – I’m going to save it for next time because I don’t want to bombard anyone.

One final note to any writers/artists out there who want to be a part of the martini-lounge – they’re currently accepting applications for you to be part of their staff! The Martini Lounge is an online community for women that showcases young women writers and artists – it’s a wonderful place for young women to voice their opinions, read about important issues to them, and just hang out! There are lots of positions available, so go apply!

feeling: Itchy
listening to: Coheed and Cambria – Cuts Marked in the March of Men


August 22, 2005

I’m at Jacqueline and Tristan’s house right now – and we’re bored – and the boyfriends are watching total recall – so it’s INTERVIEW TIME WITH JACKIE!!!!! Here goes:

Lauren: Ms. J – Thankyou for being interviewed for!

Jacqueline: Well thank you so much for having me on this respectful and oh-so-sexual website. Yum.

L: What do your hands smell like right now?

J: A little bit of General Tsao’s chicken and a little bit of my boyfriend’s ball sweat. Ew.

L: mmmm! ball sweat. You have a lot of mosquito bites right now – how did that happen, yo?

J: I got really drunk for my birthday and when I woke up I was covered in honey, semen and about 50 mosquito bites- it was the best night of my life. I think…

L: What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

J: Called my friend’s ex at like 6 in the morning and said I was his pregnant girlfriend, then tried to kick down their door, then got locked in a crackhouse with like 10 girls, a guy and a rabid dog … I also had a 5some with some hobos and smashed my old school’s windows.. 🙂

L: If you could kill anyone (or everyone) in the whole wide world, would you? and who?

J: I would kill about 4 select people…I will not give their names for legal reasons but BEWARE ____, ____, ____ and Roseanne Barr. Oopppppps 😉

L: Favourite movie?

J: Animal House… Half Baked, I love Blow…I like Mean Girls…I like Austin Powers 1, 2, 3 and I like SEVEN because I would like to torture fat, vain and ugly people…SLOTH! muahahhahaa

L: Yeah – I liked the torture parts in mean girls too. *shashashashashaaaa* Favourite song right now?

J: ‘Nononono, baby Nononono don’t liiiiiieeee’ – Black Eyed Peas

L: Favourite type of porn?

J: Doggie-Kitty-Anal-Kiddy-buttfunk-MY CUMFARTS-are-your-Dinner-porn. YAAAAH!

L: Who’s your idol?

J: My mom- she’s taught me everything I’ve expressed above. SHOUTOUT to Rosalie HOSEBAG! yeahhhh!

L: You’re mom is the shizznat, eh? She’s hot. If a midget wanted to have sex with you – would you be down?

J: no, but if he’s got a dick my friend ashley will. HAHAAAAAAAAAa

L: Damn straight she will 😉 She loves it in the tunepoon! hahaha jk, We love you Ashley 🙂 ANyways…. speaking of rotten crotches, How’s your arch rival ______ _______ these days?

J: Well, as I’ve seen recently, she looks to have added the mass of a baby killer whale onto her frame and her face looks like my sister’s diarreah after she’s ingested some dairy products – INCLUDING low fat yogurt. Jk p_____, no beef baby – no beef.

L: J___ HAS DIARREAH!!! HARSH. The views and opinions expressed in this interview do no necessarily reflect those of

J: Shut up, you shiza eating muthafucka! Eat my shawarma cumfarts.


J: Whatever, I do what I wannnnnt, when I want. Shaka-kahn we be rocking we be rocking Shaka-kahn.

L: you chode-nibbling, mah FAH!

J: Cumfartumbous

L: Well ladies and gents, there you have it. An in-depth, warm hearted interview with J-Jizzums. Anything else to add poochykins?

J: Check – CH-CH-CH- CHECK CHECK CHECK out my fuckign RECORD- cumming out Sptember 6th, 2006- YEAH BABY! “your cumfarts iz ma DINNAAAAAHh” The JUZZUM J LP MUTHA what ?? yeah..I have some serious issues so SUCK MY LABIA you JIZUUUUMMMMS…MY father died in 9/11 for your sins, you bastards! I am emotionally DITIZZZZ-tURBED bitch.

L: I love my stinkyfingered-hobo fucker! She’s hyper hahaha


L: See what I mean?

J: I love you mom. rememebr that I got a scholarhsip..ok>?>??? I’m smart..I still have my grades – just not my sanity. LOVE YOU! (cumfarts ahoy!)

– the end –
-Lauren O’Neil-


August 18, 2005

*EDIT* – My cat can fetch. Check out the video in the media section! And see my drunk friends make fun of my uber cool website, wa-ha-ha 😉 */EDIT*

I’m such a knob gobbler haha – I can’t believe I blogged when I was drunk – of all things. I should have been sleeping! I barely even remember writing that… which probably explains the horrendous spelling!

Bwahhhh – I’ve been hearing a lot in other girls’ blogs recently about the camgirl documentary that’s currently being produced by Adakin. I can’t wait to see it! Lots of my favourite chicas will be in it – like Renee and Jess and Li and lots of other hot camgirls – after reading about this vegas trip I’m uber excited to see the finished product! I want to be in a documentary. Hear me film makers? Make a documentary about me – a 19 year old university student who’s main hobbies consist of studying, smoking up, studying, watching movies and studying. That would interesting, eh? haha.

I have about 100 emails in my inbox that I have flagged as ‘unread’ because I need to get back to them. I don’t even want to think about tackling them until saturday- this is like, 2 months worth of emails about fansigns, vid requests, link exchanges, and personal emails. Sorry if you’re someone who’s waiting on something… forgive me! I’m a busy girl as of late – what with my working all the time in HELL!

I found an email from a couple of months ago that I got from Lacey with FANSIGNS FOR ME! 🙂 woot woot! I love ’em! I have been meaning to post these but kept forgetting. See all 3 in the gallery, and go visit Lacey because she is hottness personified.

My phone keeps ringing, so I’d better answer it. I hope that someone’s calling to tell me that Fabco has burned down and that I have the rest of the summer off. That would be righteous.

Now, Let’s all ogle the insanse hottness that is Leonardo Dicaprio in Basketball Diaries – sooooo badass.


August 17, 2005


*edit* I just adopted a Llama! Meet Julius –>

my pet!


I’m drunk. Happy Birthday Ms. Jacqueline L~! I just wemt to the elaphatna’s nest with jackie and ashley nd we had so much fun! And we wnet to spanky’s too! and I danced on stage – but i didnt’ get naked of course, because i’m not a whore. I’m just a fun girl.

I love YOUUUUUUUU!!! We need to eat dill pickle dip and watch jerry springer at Jessica’;s house agin okayu? OKAY!?K>!
THtat’s enough blgoging for me =- it’s 3am and I need to get to bed – work tommorow – at the factory. BOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

More blogging tommorow – lots of pics, and maybe, just mayybe even a VIDEO! That’s right my friends. I’m doing it up hardcore styles… haha i’m so hardcore. jkj.

Bon nuit!

OHHHH and bruce campbell is a hot hot HOT action/comedy hero – you can find him in the evil dead series – and army of darkness- which is part of the evil dead series. Greatest zombie movie ever. I love squelletes!

I never drink. Just for jakcie’s brithday.

i’m back.

August 11, 2005

I’m back! Thanks to everyone for your condolences… I should have been more specific in my last post. It was my cat Diamonds who died – I’ve had her since I was 6. She was 14 years old and like a member of the family. I’ll always miss her… she grew up with me – but animals die and life goes on. I’m doing fine – I’ve got Tickery here to cheer me up. She’s not Dimey, but in time I’m sure that I’ll love her as much as I loved Diamonds.

I’ve been trying to work on a new layout, but it’s hard because the internet connection on my computer has died again. It was gone for a month and I could do nothing to fix it, then it worked for like a week, and now it’s gone again! So I’m back to using my brother’s computer upstairs – without photoshop or psp… it sucks. I guess I’ll have to wait until I go back to school to worry about it. I made something very pure and white and simple… but I almost think it’s too simple so I’m not using it. Gah – I hate simplicity! Yet strangely, I crave it. what’s a girl to do?

Haha, Tickery is watching the ceiling fan go round and round… she’s so funny.

In conclusion, Bruce Campbell is hot and I love Marijuana.

I just found out that Diamonds is going to be euth…

August 7, 2005

I just found out that Diamonds is going to be euthanized on Monday. I’ve been crying ever since. Hiatus until further notice – except for the cam, which will be updated so that I don’t get canned from the portals.